I play a lot of Call of Duty: Black Ops 3. I love this game. Nothing gives me wood faster than a head shot with my modified Razorback machine gun. It blows a lot of stress (when I am doing well) and, because I have a lot of friends that play, affords me the opportunity to say things to my friends I would never say at work or in front of their wives.

But, when playing these games and being social, there are hard rules that should be followed (though these rules never are) so that one’s enjoyment does not infringe on the enjoyment of others. Now, these are not rules written in stone (though they should be) but are the unwritten rules we should follow. Kind of like not break dancing after hitting a home run at a baseball game. The pitcher will throw at your head at the next at bat.

So, before you throw on that headset, understand and follow these rules.

Do not play loud music (especially Rap) when playing an online game.

This drives me nuts. If I want to listen to music, I will throw a little Stevie Nicks on the turn table and mute my microphone. I have absolutely no desire to listen to that new Japanese Techno Lounge album you picked up that afternoon. Mute you microphone. When people are online, with a microphone, it is to talk with friends or discuss strategy. Be prepared to be kicked or muted.

Do not talk crap after winning. 

So you just won a game. Good for you. But this is not an invitation to start talking garbage (especially if you died more you killed). Remember: there are going to be times you will lose and you sure do not want to hear the squawking of an over-proud peacock. Anyway, those who are used to winning usually don’t need to rub it in the losers face. Act like you have won before.

Do not talk crap after losing.

If you should not garbage talk after winning, definitely don’t do it after you got your ass handed to you. Just say, “good game” and move on. Nothing is funnier than hearing someone who lost talking smack. Even if I have not played my best on the winning team, I will talk garbage to the whining loser. The Law of the Scoreboard applies to gaming. And also do not scream and bitch about the other team cheating. That does not happen as often as people think (and it is really obvious when someone is cheating). So, if you lose, put your big boy pants on and don’t whine about it.

Do not tell anyone you are going over to their house to kick their ass.

This just makes me laugh. First off, I would guarantee that anyone that tells me he is going to kick my ass probably is living in the fantasy world where he thinks he is some sort of MMA champion instead of the overweight, acne-laden pizza-eater that he actually is. Second, we are online! I live in California and the threatening party probably lives in New Jersey. I am pretty sure the chance of meeting the individual who threatens me is pretty obscure. It’s just a dumb thing to say.

Act your age.

In the online gaming work, there are a lot of little kids playing. I mean ages 8-15 years of age. And these kids are the worst when it comes to violating all the online etiquette rules. They cuss, talk garbage to the adults, whine and cry when they lose and puff their chests when they win. Here’s a news flash for all those whipper-snappers out there: Just because you spend every waking hour, outside of school, playing a video game does not make you better than anyone else. In fact, it kind of makes you more pathetic in the eyes of people who have careers. Remember this: You may rock at a video game now, but you’ll be serving me my french fries five years from now.

Stop using the N-word and other cuss words.

I am a white guy but I still think the use of the N-word is very bad. Don’t do it. Just because no one can see you does not mean that it is fine to use it. It is a terrible word and I hate hearing it from anyone’s mouth. Just because no one knows who you are does not mean you are being a racist and I will block anyone who uses it. This goes with any word that belittles any group (Hispanic, homosexual and so forth). Likewise, cussing too much is just ugly. I will cuss everyone once in a while as a reaction to something bad happening to me during the game, but I will not string out curse after curse. And I will rarely direct it at someone (unless he deserves it).

Accidents do happen. Get over it.

In Call of Duty, I play the Hard Core mode. This means that one shot will usually kill and you can kill players from your own team. I, having an itchy trigger finger, have been known to pop my own team mates. When I do this, I will say I’m sorry. Normally, I will get a “good job, team mate” which is the sarcastic “watch what the hell you are doing” without actually saying it. But, every once in a while, someone will just go off and start cussing me out. This is just not necessary because 1) I do not want to lose and 2) I will get kicked out of the game if I kill too many people. So you know I am not doing it on purpose. But some people think my sole purpose is to shoot my own team mates and lose. To that person yelling at me for killing him once, I will usually go out of my way to kill him again.

Online gaming is a community where friends and strangers can meet up for some fun. Keep it fun and follow the above unwritten rules.

 

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